Welcome to Module 1: The Style Rules: How Some Guys Can Look Amazing Wearing Just a T-shirt And Jeans, While Other Guys Look Like Bums.
In this lesson, you’ll learn:
- The real reasons why it’s so hard to look good when you’re not in a suit
- How dressing well can lead to more money, more business and more sex
- The 2 (just 2!) biggest style rules all men should follow to make looking good effortless
THE MODERN MAN: MORE T-SHIRT AND JEANS THAN SUIT AND TIE
Unless you’re straight out a fictional 60s drama, chances are your workplace doesn’t have much of a dress code.
Casual Fridays have spread to the rest of the week.
Companies have relaxed their strict rules to appeal to top talent.
The Internet has given birth to remote workers and creative entrepreneurs who call coffeeshops their cubicles.
I’ll admit, when I started The Essential Man I had no idea how large this problem was. I was spending my time writing about suits. Then I started getting dozens of e-mails each week from guys who had more questions about jeans than they did ties.
The suit for men was always a symbol of manliness. It told the world you were an adult entering the real world.
The ironic thing is, men spend the majority of their lives NOT wearing suits. You’d think we’d be pros at dressing casually by now. So why is it such a tricky problem to look good without wearing one?
In this video below, I give you some of my thoughts:
THE POWER OF DRESSING WELL
Take a look at this amazing thread on Reddit where someone asks, “Why do so many guys talk about not being able to get a girl, yet never put any time into their appearance?”
Notice all the mental gymnastics some of the people go through to justify their poor appearance.
Every so often, I’ll meet a guy who, after finding out I am a Personal Stylist, will tell me how much he doesn’t care about his clothes. He’ll say:
“People should like me for who I am. Not how I look.”
One of my favorite things to do in this situation is ask the guy to describe his dream girl. Can you guess what the most common description of a dream girl is?
SHE’S HOT! (Of course she is)
People always think they’re the exceptions. They think that they aren’t “superficial”.
Think about your Boss.
If your Boss constantly came into work with mustard stains all over his shirt looking like he hasn’t had a haircut in a few months, do you think it’ll be easy to take orders from him seriously?
When you first meet someone, the majority of what they think about you comes from your appearance. It’s called thin slicing — to make snap judgments about a person based on all the information that have of you at hand. If they’ve never spoken to you before, the only thing they can judge you on is how you look. This isn’t necessarily bad, it’s evolutionary survival. It’s the caveman way of trying to figure out if the person approaching you is a friend or foe. It’s reality.
How you look can say a lot about you. It’s a safe bet that someone that is well kept takes care of themselves and has their life in order. It’s also a safe bet to assume someone in nice clothes is successful, and might be worth a conversation or two.
By contrast, someone that looks like a mess most likely has a messy, out of control life. It’s best to stay far away.
The great thing is, we can control the conversation. And it can be a very powerful tool. Take a look at this study showing patients were more likely to trust a doctor when they’re wearing a white lab coat.
Whether you’re trying to tell a first date you’re someone worth seeing more often, or tell a potential client you’re successful and want to make them successful too, dressing well is a powerful weapon to give you the edge in life.
The clothes don’t make the man, but they certainly enhance him.
HOW THIS COURSE IS GOING MAKE YOU LOOK THE BEST YOU’VE EVER LOOKED
Go to a bookstore and open the latest men’s magazine. Flip through it, what do you notice?
- 80% of the magazine has nothing to do with fashion. It’s filled with politics, sports, entertainment.
- The few articles on clothing will have headlines like “The Limited Edition Sneakers You Need Now!” and “Best Trends of 2016” How does this help you a few months or a few years down the line?
- They’ve dressed up the “celebrity of the month” in tons of great clothes but no advice on:
- How the hell should you wear it.
- How does it mix with your wardrobe.
- How can you tell if it’s a good quality piece.
A client of mine helped me understand most men’s frustrations with magazines out there. He said this:
“I’ll open a GQ and I’ll see an outfit I like. I know it looks good. But I don’t understand why.”
This course is going to show you the what, how and why.
The Casual Style Crash Course focuses on three things:
1. The Casual Style Crash Course going to show you the timeless mindsets, how to actually think about style, so you will look amazing now AND 10 years from now.
Magazines and blogs tell you what’s in style right now. The recommendations are outdated in a few months.
This course is going to teach you a bulletproof, timeless approach to style.
Imagine a professional chef going to someone else’s kitchen.
He takes a look in the cabinets, in the fridge and, no matter what’s there, whips up an amazing meal. It’s almost as if he just knows what to do, what he can make, and what’s going to taste really, really good.
He’s learned the mindset of what amazing, delicious food is. He’s not affected by temporary things like whats the latest trend in cuisine or ingredient of the month.
Once you learn the mindsets of what great style is, putting an amazing outfit together from your closet will be as effortless as a top chef walking into any kitchen.
2. The course is going to meet you where you’re at.
Magazines and blogs throw you right in the middle. They show you great outfits but don’t tell you what makes them so great. No do they tell you how it should fit in your wardrobe or life.
Whether you’ve never opened up a men’s magazine before, or if you already know what looks best on you and want to take your style to new levels, the material in this course will help you achieve your goals.
3. We’re not going to bombard you with a dozen strict rules you’ll need to memorize and follow.
The course is designed to show you the most important rules and concepts you should always keep in mind. Most importantly, the course will show you which common cliché style rules you can completely ignore.
I’ve trimmed the fat to get right to the meat.
You’re not going to be punished by some style god for not matching the color of your shoes to your belt.
This is one of my favorite quotes about style:
A man should look as if he bought his clothes with intelligence, put them on with care, and then forgotten all about them.
– Hardy Aimes
There’s nothing worse than someone that looks like they’re trying way too hard.
Great style looks effortless, because once you learn the mindsets of great style, IT IS!
Let me tell you something: Fashion is my job, and I don’t even take it THAT seriously. Neither should you.
You just want to look good. I do too! And that’s all I’m aiming to do here.
You don’t need to learn the history of denim, or learn 13 ways to tie a scarf. You just need to know what looks good on you.
“BUT, WHAT ABOUT ME? I’M TOO SHORT/ TALL/ FAT/ SKINNY?”
In this video, I’m going to give you my TWO vital rules of amazing style, and talk about why you don’t need to be a 6’2” model to look good in a t-shirt and pair of jeans. Watch the video:
LESSON 1 HOMEWORK: IDENTIFY YOUR STYLE NEEDS TYPE
Everyone taking this course is going to have different style needs. Some guys work in business casual environments (sports coats but no ties). Other guys might be working for themselves and want to look good while they hop from coffeeshop to coffeeshop.
In order to customize this course for you, I’m going to help you identify your own style needs right now. In later lessons, we’ll be using your answer in this exercise to help you make certain choices – from what to buy for your wardrobe, to how to put outfits together. So make sure you do this exercise before you move on to the next lessons.
Action Step: On a piece of paper or your notebook, record your LETTER answer to each question.
Tip: Don’t worry if it’s not the exact answers, just pick the closest one. We just want to ballpark it.
WORK: What’s the dress code at your workplace?
A. T-shirt and Jeans are ok.
B. Button up shirts, chinos and leather boots.
C. Sports coat or casual suits, but usually no ties.
PLAY: What do you like (prefer) to wear when you’re not working? On the weekends?
A. T-shirt and jeans.
B. Button up shirts, chinos and leather boots.
C. Sports coat or casual suits, but usually no ties.
GOALS: What’s your #1 goal that you want to achieve at the end of this course?
A. I want to dress more casual and still look really good.
B. I want to have an extremely versatile wardrobe that is appropriate for serious business meetings and weekend drinks with my friends.
C. I want to be taken seriously without wearing a full suit and tie
Answer Key: Tally up your answers. Record your “Style Needs” Type
A. Effortlessly Casual If your answers are mostly As, then your style need goal is to be Effortless Casual. You probably never find yourself in a suit, even if you’re meeting with a client. The goal for you is building a casual wardrobe that looks amazing, without being boring or making you look like you’re still in college.
B. Smart Casual If your answers are mostly Bs or one of each letter, then your style need goal is to master Smart Casual. This is the most versatile for the three types. It’s for the man that might need to really dress up on occasion, whether it’s for a meeting or just cause. The Smart Casual type is adaptive, and can dress up and down depending on the situation, but still look good.
C. Business Casual If your answers are mostly Cs, then your style need goal is the Business Casual. Whether you’re the man in charge, or just prefer to be on the more formal dressy side. You’ve tossed out your ties, but have hung onto your sports coats. Business casual is all about mastering the balance of being serious but relaxed.
LESSON 1 RECAP
- How we look, how we dress, communicates to people a lot about us. By improving how well dressed we are, we can use these snap judgments to our advantage in business, our relationships, and life.
- Dressing well has almost nothing to do with whether we won the genetic lottery. Any man, tall, short, skinny or fat, can look amazing if he follows the Two Rules to Amazing Style:
1) Buy clothes that fit your body.
2) Build a core, versatile wardrobe that makes putting amazing looks together effortless.
- Each person has different style needs. Identifying your “Style Needs Type” – Effortlessly Casual, Smart Casual or Business Casual, will ensure you build the right wardrobe to fit your lifestyle.
ACTION STEPS & HOMEWORK
- Take the Style Needs Type quiz and Identify your Style Need Type.
- Post in the Facebook group ONE surprising insight from this lesson.